I believe that having a community and social engagement are as important to good health as diet and exercise.

Yet I’ve found that finding or creating community is a constant challenge in my adult life.

Sure, moving around a lot hasn’t helped, though I wouldn’t change that aspect of my life. I think, though, that even people who’ve mostly lived in the same geographies find it challenging to cultivate community after a certain age. People move away, the people who stay change over time as do their lives, and the pressures of work and family make it hard for us to maintain our friendships and acquaintanceships.

I’ve loved joining communities when I can find them, though I’ve often had to put in the extra effort to create communities if I want the social connection I lack. (Same challenge with finding friends in each place I’ve lived!)

I’m no community-creation expert, but these are things I’ve done to build my own communities. If you’ve created communities in the past, I’d love to hear what worked for you. The more ideas, the better. Creating community has sure felt like an ongoing effort in my life, and I’ll no doubt need to keep at it!

Use Your Passion or Hobby

Most people have something they love to do and they are rarely the only person in the world or even in their geographical area who loves doing that thing.

I’ve joined groups that get together to work on craft projects, to discuss books, to read and critique and support each other’s writing, and to play board games.

You can even get far more creative than that.

I once created a monthly movie night that became so popular I was asked to reserve a private room. You’re welcome to steal the idea: One Friday a month, just before the first main screening hour, everyone met in front of the box office at a theater to vote on the movie we wanted to see. Sometimes we all went to one film, sometimes we had two factions. After the movie, we walked around the corner to a local restaurant for dinner and discussion. People loved it.

A friend of mine and her husband created a monthly group of Lego aficionados. They dubbed it “BYOL,” or “Bring Your Own Legos.” Everyone brought a set on a given Sunday afternoon and sat around a bunch of tables in her home, chatting and working on their creations. The couple had a few snacks and people brought their own snacks to contribute, but the party was essentially come-as-you-are and eat-or-don’t-eat. The point was just to hang out and chat and play with our projects for the afternoon. I moved away and still miss that group.

The great thing about creating a group around a hobby or passion is that you can revel in that love with other people who love it, too. Even better, having something to work on together or a specific subject to discuss as a group takes away the discomfort of open discussion with people you don’t know or even people you do. (Finding topics to connect a group, even a group of friends, isn’t always easy.)

How to get started? Create a notice for people in your area that you’re forming a group around whatever passion or hobby. Post it on social media, local-area message boards and sites, and even on physical bulletin boards of businesses catering to your hobby or passion.

Connect with People in Your Neighborhood or Complex

A couple of times, I was lucky to live in a neighborhood where the people there got together for coffee, brunch, discussion, dinner, or what-have-you.

The feeling of having people nearby that you can casually drop by to see or to help is rare these days. Maybe it always way, but I have a honeyed idea of days past when popping into see a neighbor wasn’t so nearly unheard of.

If a neighborhood group doesn’t exist where you are or you don’t know of one, why not try to create it?

Put up a sign in your building or neighborhood common area (I’ve seen several public bulletin boards in local libraries, bookstores, and even groceries) inviting people to circle up over coffee or tea at a nearby café or even at your home or in your yard or garden, if you’re comfortable with that. The great thing about organizing it yourself is that you get to pick a weekly or monthly day or time that works for you.

See a Need and Find People to Help Meet It

Anyone living in a place, whether a small town or a large city, will have seen several areas of need, whether to clean up a park or green area or to gather items for people in need or to beautify a playground. Could even be that there’s a neighbor who, you’ve noticed, needs a little help with some of the heavy lifting in their yard.

The ideas and the needs are endless.

If you’ve noticed something that needs doing in your area, others nearby likely have noticed it as well. Consider gathering people to get it done together once you’ve ensured you have any needed approval. Pick a single project as a starting point, gather people to get it done, and then ask the group afterward if they would like to get together regularly to tackle similar projects. I bet several people will say yes. The reward or seeing a needed job done and of getting it done in the company of other warmhearted people is something everyone wants to repeat.

Put out your notice for helpers anywhere other people may have seen the same need but not thought about how to tackle it. You can post it on internet message boards targeting your community, on social media sites and pages, and even on physical boards in and around your area.

Countering Your Pushback

I can hear you balking from here:

• I’m too shy. Your shyness doesn’t matter. Everyone who comes to what you’ve planned has put themselves in the vulnerable position of meeting new people, and they see you as their fearless leader. When you work to ensure everyone else is comfortable, your shyness will melt away.

• No one will come. No harm, no foul. If people don’t come, you didn’t spent much time or effort in trying. Just don’t get overly discouraged. Just try it or something else again at a different time. People may not have seen the opportunity or couldn’t respond to it when you first put it out. I’ve had this happen more than once and it always turned out to be a timing issue.

• I might not like the people who respond. Problem people often peel away after one or two meetings. If they don’t, tell everyone you’ve had something come up and need to focus your energies elsewhere for right now, but they’re welcome to continue the group without you. Just try again later; you’ll get a different crew when you do.

As with everything you do, you’ve got to try and try again when you build community. Rarely does anything come off perfectly on the first try.

Everyone Wants Community

As you contemplate how to do all this and feel a little daunted, if not slightly vulnerable about putting yourself out there, remember: Everyone wants community and few people take the initiative to create one. They may not even know how to look for one that already exists, as they’ve never done the research to try.

I’ve never failed to notice the intense gratitude of other people each time I’ve created a community. People are incredibly thankful for an opportunity to meet and connect with like-minded others on a regular basis. I never feel like I deserve the thanks I get, as my entire motivation was my own need for community, but I’m always gratified that I wasn’t the only one who craved it. There are just too few people willing to put themselves out there to create one.

We’re a world suffering from a lot of loneliness and disconnection. You can help change that.

The Effort’s Worth It

Yes, creating community rather than joining a group or activity, finding a ready-made group, takes a lot more effort.

However, try as we might, the existing communities we can find around us may not fit our needs or schedules or personalities.

And as community is essential to our wellbeing as humans, I can’t recommend more highly making the effort to build one if you can’t find one. The reward is worth the trouble, I promise.