Single Women and Nurturing
I’d venture without much beyond observational evidence that women friends—single and in relationships—nurture each other more than male friends do. And I’d agree with my friend Joan in her observation that single female friends naturally take more direct care of each other than paired-up women do with their friends. In fact, it seems especial nurturing between single women doesn’t even need requesting.
It just happens. Naturally.
We check in and pitch in when one of us ails. If we haven’t connected in a while, we ensure no adverse events have befallen our buddy and ensure she doesn’t need help with something. We provide emotional and physical support with daily chores (house and car maintenance, errands, rides to and from medical appointments) and through life milestones (deaths, birthdays, promotions, terminations). We convene more often than we might if we had partners (partly because we have more flexibility in how we spend our time).
My conversation with Joan reminded me of a previous post I’ve written about men and singlehood. Could lack of nurturing from male friends prove another factor in men’s greater difficulty with singlehood than women—especially given the complexities inherent in friendships between single males and single or paired females?
Yet how can I say that single men don’t nurture each other in the same way that single women do? Without any direct experience of single malehood and without having spoken with any men I know about the level of nurturing in their friendships, I speak purely from assumption. I may be completely mistaken.
And so I ask: Single men and men single recently enough to remember, what say you? Do single men provide each other especial nurturing and caretaking?
Or is it just a single female thing?